It is Christmas in 16 days and my house is a complete tip. I am working lots of hours from my desk at home and taking little breaks in which I alternately do small cleaning tasks and order giant quantities of cleaning supplies off Amazon. I am on a mission to get the house spotless by Christmas despite the amount of work on my desk and it’s going to be quite a challenge.

In an effort to power myself through two weeks of effortfully de-filthing my house, I am a brand new follower of Mrs Hinch (@mrshinchhome on Insta), the British cleaning superstar. Mrs Hinch seems a lovely girl, if a bit common, and she knows more than I will probably ever know about how to have a clean home so I am joining her cult for two weeks to get the job done.

Anyone who follows Mrs Hinch (and she has a big following) will immediately recognise this photo as a massive Hinch Haul.

Signature Hinch products are: Zoflora concentrated disinfectant – mine is a Christmassy cinnamon fragrance, if ‘fragrance’ is the right word for something that strong; Pink Stuff paste which I think might be for cleaning the cooker and the famous Minky cleaning pad – mine is super special because it is a limited-edition winter print with snowflakes. Ooh.

This is the kit I’ve assembled so far. Other exciting items are on their way such as new-fangled types of dusters, comedy slippers that double as mops and a gadget that sucks water off windows, tiles and shower doors. I’ve even got scrubbing brush attachments that fit on a small power drill. Now I simply need to find my drill.

So as well as going mad on Amazon, buying products, I’ve paused long enough to do a couple of tasks in the Hinch style and fashion. I excitedly took my new Minky and sprayed it with a solution of Lenor fabric conditioner, in the Spring Awakening fragrance that Mrs H recommends. Then I used the Minky to clean accumulated grime off my worst door. It was really successful in removing the gunk although I am not 100% sure I used the correct side of the Minky, I will have to watch the demonstration again. This caused my door to look very clean and stink to high heaven of Spring Awakening, which I gather is intentional.

Then my Minky was filthy. Mrs H soaks her used Minkies (it sounds so rude) in a mix of hot water and Zoflora overnight, so that’s what I’m doing. So now the hallway honks of Spring Awakening and the kitchen reeks of Warm Cinnamon. Added to this, I have covered all the taps, plug holes and the draining board with Viakal limescale remover, where it will sit overnight. And there is scented bleach in both toilets. So that’s why my house pongs.

Anyway, one door is clean, so it’s a start.

This cleaning project had better help me lose some weight as it is what we are having instead of gym until Xmas.